That was more difficult than I thought it should be. In fact even when I achieved it, well afterward my reasonable voice the stupid overseer of the operation would always come in with idiotic dumb stupid comments. -and the thing is, that stuff can fry your brain, demotivate you, ruin your thread, and in fact that fool can get you to move out years without painting. You would be sitting there thinking hey I used to paint well I don't anymore you know kids and taxes and bills and work they just get in the way blah blah blah. And if you go back to that guy he will say, I just thought that one painting was lousy, you asked and so I told you so. You stopped painting on your own...
Thinking is the worst thing in painting it seems to me. I don't really think one needs inspiration either, you just need to not think, just clear your mind if you need to and paint. Now getting there took me a lot of effort, and thousands of mantras, thousands and thousands. I would do them and then when I was exhausted run in and paint.
Sometimes, occasionally, I could get there without doing them, I'd just get up in the morning and paint. You can't do dumb things like watch tv or go on youtube or any of that stuff, you just gotta paint. But when you start this mad routine, you can't open any mail or pay bills or talk to anybody or even take any phone calls, you can't care about a broken faucet or anything. Just nothing.
All you can or should do is paint. For me these paintings are like little children and I love everyone of them ...and more importantly they have their own lives and I should just let them grow. If I want to hate one, well I'll just make a new one and hate it I guess though of course that is not possible. Just paint a new one.
Om eim sarah swat yei swaha.
Thinking is the worst thing in painting it seems to me. I don't really think one needs inspiration either, you just need to not think, just clear your mind if you need to and paint. Now getting there took me a lot of effort, and thousands of mantras, thousands and thousands. I would do them and then when I was exhausted run in and paint.
All you can or should do is paint. For me these paintings are like little children and I love everyone of them ...and more importantly they have their own lives and I should just let them grow. If I want to hate one, well I'll just make a new one and hate it I guess though of course that is not possible. Just paint a new one.
Om eim sarah swat yei swaha.
NON COGITO, ERGO SUM
Not sure which is more enchanting, your paintings or your stories? I guess they go together and fit inside each other nicely! It's interesting because I thought that I stopped writing for the opposite reason ~ because I had found that empty mind... I had such a good time there...I forgot about writing!
ReplyDeleteYes, how many people have I allowed to derail me over the years? so much more would have happened if i had been courageous enough to block it out. People think they are doing you a favor when they dump their doubts on you. Not the deepest reference, but I read an interview of Clint Eastwood and many people tried to dissuade him from making Million Dollar Baby. It's one of the finest films I've seen. Blocking out the doubts is a challenge, ESP bc sometimes they come from people we really respect.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you can block it out. Because those comments only are echoes of what is inside you already. You must always just move forward.
ReplyDelete